Friends are precious to an introvert. It's not easy for me to let people in and I have always held back from emotional attachments. Maybe it was the mother abandoning thing, or something else genetic. I like solitude and peace, am comfortable in my own company and (used to) be able to live a rich dream life in my head. As a teenager I will escape into radio for years on end, developing a vast and useless encyclopedic knowledge of obscure 80's bands, songs, and lyric sheets.
Now though....it's different for me.
I realize my time here is finite and a gift. It is obvious to me immediately after my diagnosis that my friends are amazing, kind, lovely women. They save me time and time again, together, individually, early in the morning, late at night, crying with me in person and on the phone, listening to my deepest fears and horrors and not trying to fix anything. See that's the key - they know they cannot do anything other than be there for me. And most times, it's more than enough to get me through the night, the day, the minute. How did I, a child of poor West Virginia Hillbillies and German pig farmers, get so lucky?
So, this post is for my girls. Kim L., Cheri, Robin, Anni, Lauren, Theresa, Haley, Jean, Elaine, Lori, Cassie, Jacqueline, Angie, Eileen, Denise, Gwen, Kim W., Rebecca, Kim H., all my BC support group. I love you guys and you make me want to be a better friend.