Friday, May 19, 2017

The Goodbye Girl

I was born with an overabundant love of nostalgia. Goodbyes have never been easy.

Saying goodbye to my old job circa 2014 was crushing, and not just because of breast cancer, and all the charms that go with it. That apocalyptic, scary as shit diagnosis out of the literal blue and the ensuing frenetic medical carnival. The feeling that the universe was shitting on me for some reason that I could never fathom. I'd been a pretty good person overall - in my opinion, there were many, truly evil, awful people that deserved truckloads of all kinds of cancer (all of which are still alive of course, with nary a health care in the world).

But back to my point. See, I truly loved my job.

Yesterday during a temp gig, a call came in - guess who?  My old boss from my last job pre-BC!  

It was nice to catch up. It was even nicer to learn that he finally is closing up shop next month. 

Maybe he took the advice which I bark at him, chapter and verse, between gritted teeth when we say goodbye in 2014. Despite my sad state, so emotionally decimated and nauseated from the first chemo it's difficult to form coherent thought or even walk, I tell him to look outside at the beautiful day and that maybe, since he is beyond financially secure, it would be better to be enjoying life vs. being hunched over that fucking keyboard all day. Which is where some other future assistant will one day find his corpse, on some other fine day just like this one, hunched over for in earnest and forevermore. Because you really never know, how many days you have left.

It is good to hear his voice, to know his family is well. Instead of the sadness I imagined feeling for my old life, there is only peace and contentment, and looking forward with hope. We had a good run, didn't we? I'm proud of the quality of our teamwork.

 Happy retirement, Boss.